The Other Side of Brokenness

A few years ago, I sat on my back porch with one of our campus pastors who was struggling in his role. It was clear that he may not make it as a campus pastor.

It wasn’t because he wasn’t trying. This guy was bringing his best. And it wasn’t because he didn’t care. No one cared more than he did. This guy simply wasn’t succeeding at producing the right outcomes through his people.

When he asked my advice, I told him that God needed to break him. That obviously wasn’t what he wanted to hear. Through tears he told me that he was pretty sure that he was broken.

I explained that if he was “pretty sure,” then he wasn’t broken. When you are broken, you know for sure you are broken.

Over a series of other painful events, this campus pastor finally reached a place of deep brokenness before God. When many parts of his life fell apart, God started putting them back together. Almost overnight, this pastor became an infinitely better spiritual leader and is leading a campus in a way that truly honors God.

Recently he told a group of people, “You won’t really know the goodness of God until you are totally broken.”

If you are hurting deeply right now, God’s love and power are even more evident on the other side of brokenness.

23 comments

Keeping Things In Perspective

While uneducated or cruel critics can be distracting, try to keep things in perspective. Where I live, ministers’ (or Christians’) lives are rarely in danger for being a Christian. Countless numbers of believers have suffered gravely for their faith in Christ. If all we have to do is endure a few people complaining, blogging, or writing emails, we haven’t suffered much.

Besides, when someone takes a shot at us or our churches, if their criticism isn’t true or valid, what does it really matter? If we can stand before God with integrity, it doesn’t matter what someone else says. It only matters what God thinks.

Rather than honing in on the negative, I try to remember that our battle is not against flesh and blood. Instead of being sidelined by criticism, I choose to stay in the game and fight the more important fight.

The best way to avoid criticism is to not do anything significant. That’s one reason I don’t worry a lot when we receive occasional criticism. I worry more when we don’t.

21 comments

Don’t Fight Back

Some criticism of our ministries will be valid. Others will come from partially informed people who will not likely ever understand or like our philosophy of ministry.

With the explosion of online critics, it is tempting to jump into a conversation to tell your side of the story. While there might be an appropriate time, usually, defending your ministry only pours gas on the fire.

Some ministry leaders seem to lead and preach from a defensive stance. They’ll rally their crowd in support of what they are doing in the face of criticism. While this may occasionally be wise, if it becomes a habit, it will build a defensive ministry rather than an offensive one.

If you’re confident in what God has called you to do, you won’t need to spend more time defending it rather than just doing it.

I am hopeful that the people in our ministry are confident and secure in what God is calling us to do. With training, they’ll acknowledge that many won’t understand our style or philosophy of ministry. We can be okay with that.

Rather than being distracted by other battles, we’ll try to keep focused on the most important one.

16 comments

Personal Generosity

Several pastors have complained to me that most people in their churches are not generous. I’m guessing that the churches are a reflection of its leaders. If our ministries aren’t generous, it is probably because we aren’t.

Several years ago, God started moving our family toward a much more intentional life of generosity. Not surprisingly, our church has followed.

Dave Ramsey is one of the best Christian financial teachers in the world. For years, we’ve embraced his teaching faithfully.

Dave has always encouraged people to “live like no one else, so one day you can live like no one else.” In other words, if you sacrifice, live beneath your means, save and invest, one day you’ll have the freedom to do far more than most.

In our family, we’ve altered the phrase slightly  (and I’m certain Dave would be supportive).

We will live like no one else, so we can give like no one else.

As God blesses us with more, instead of drastically increasing our standard of living, we’ve decided to drastically increase our standard of giving.

Why stop at giving 10%, 12%, 30% or 50%? Because God has given us more, we believe we’re called to give more.

And as we as leaders give more, our churches will reflect God’s heart of generosity.

8 comments

One Thing to Let Go

As God is leading you forward into the New Year…

• What is one thing you need to let go?

The Apostle Paul was describing how he wanted to know Christ and the power of his resurrection. He admitted that he hadn’t taken hold of it yet and wrote the words recorded in Philippians 3:14-14, “…But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

I’m not certain what he wanted to forget and let go. Perhaps it was the Christians he hurt, tortured or killed. Maybe it was the abuse he suffered for boldly serving Christ: being beaten with the rod, whipped, stoned and left for dead. Maybe it was a personal failure we know nothing about.

Whatever it was, Paul knew he needed to let go of something from the past to move forward with God.

Maybe someone hurt you and you continue to harbor bitterness. Perhaps your spouse betrayed you and you still are trying to punish him or her. Maybe you let yourself down, let God down, or let those around you down, and you haven’t let it go. Perhaps you failed and fear failing again.

What one thing do you need to let go to move forward with God?

11 comments

One Thing You Lack

When it comes to your relationship with God…

• What  one thing do you lack?

When a rich young man encountered Jesus, he wanted to know what he must do to receive eternal life. Jesus told him to obey all the commands. The confident up-and-comer believed that he’d been obedient since he was a child.

Mark 10:21-22 records what happened next. “Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” At this the man’s face fell. He went away sad, because he had great wealth.

Unfortunately, there was one thing that stood in the way of this man and his pursuit of the fullness of God in Christ: his love of his stuff. Sadly, he was unwilling to address this one hindrance.

What about you? What one thing is keeping you from further serving Christ? Maybe you have drifted from your study of God’s word or from prayer? Maybe you lack true and strong accountability? Perhaps your life is void of close Christian friends. Maybe you’ve been gripped by the things of this world rather than God’s kingdom.

Be honest. When it comes to your relationship with God, what one thing do you lack?

16 comments

The Good Ones That Don’t Think They Are Good

Many times some of the best (developing) leaders are strong leaders but don’t realize they are.

A lot of the great leaders have very high standards for themselves. Because they have such aggressive goals, they often don’t achieve all they’d like to achieve.

Because they didn’t meet their own expectations, they often don’t feel like they are doing a great job.

It is fun to invest in this type of growing leader. Since they don’t feel like they are great, they are often very teachable.

Those who think they are already good often aren’t as hungry to grow—ultimately limiting their potential.

13 comments

Sharing the Final 10%

In my own life, sharing the first 90% of my heart is the easiest. The first 90% rarely takes any risk.

When it comes to developing intimacy, it usually happens when I share the final 10%. (The final 10% often consists of some combination of my fears, insecurities, doubts, and weaknesses.)

Most likely, like you, I’ve been burned after sharing the final 10%. Because of my hurts, for too long I kept the final 10% to myself.

Looking back, it is amazing how much this barrier limited my relationships.

Now, I’m blessed to share the final 10% with many people.  It is in final 10% I find the most healing, intimacy, and trust.

How about you?

14 comments