Comments on: Moral Margin

By: russbutcher.com » Blog Archive » Worth Reading

russbutcher.com » Blog Archive » Worth Reading — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 11:35:18 +0000

[...] is a great post on the dangers of flirting with sin. It is a must read! Share and Enjoy: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers [...]

By: GREAT POSTS I WISH I WOULD HAVE WRITTEN «

GREAT POSTS I WISH I WOULD HAVE WRITTEN « — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 04:08:43 +0000

[...] http://swerve.lifechurch.tv/2008/03/06/moral-margin/ [...]

By: The Church Of Oprah « Floating Axhead

The Church Of Oprah « Floating Axhead — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 01:37:38 +0000

[...] I contrasted this with a post at swerve on Moral Margin… [...]

By: Beth

Beth — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 14:38:58 +0000

Im reading many in this post, refer to scripture. I had an experience just the other day; I was reading my bible, my husband was in the background with the kids watching ‘The Simpsons’. As Im reading, I hear the t.v., and it comes to my attention the extreme contrast from the t.v. and the Word. I am of the belief that if we are to stay in the Word….we will not fall victim to the temptation that is inevitably going to come our way.

By: Mike Ash

Mike Ash — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 16:56:57 +0000

Andy Stanley’s book, “Best Question Ever,” is a great book to deal with this stuff. It’s one of my favorite books of all time.

By: Mark

Mark — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 14:54:08 +0000

Craig’s question: How can you put more distance between yourself and unnecessary temptations?

Moral Margin….What a scary thought, it sounds like you would need to apply a mathematical equation to see just where you should land that as Craig stated would allow us to flirt with disaster!

Here are a couple of rules (yes rules) that I live by as a man and husband with regard to interaction with the opposite sex…..I don’t have many rules, but on this issue I do…..

1. If she looks good coming, it’s not a sin after all I’m a man…..If she looks good in profile, I need to check my heart it’s suspect…..If she looks good going, (for me) it’s sin, the long look is reserved for my wife only…..

2. Every conversation/interaction I have with someone of the opposite sex needs to be had as if my wife were standing there

Without question I do not want to grieve the heart of God through my actions and therefore my actions should be honoring to Him in all situations. But also on regular occasion, at least 1x every week I review the damage that would be done if my actions are dishonoring to God…..What will the affect be on my wife?…How about my children?… Friends?…Family?…Ministry Partners?…and the list go’s on and on!

By: carey nieuwhof

carey nieuwhof — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 12:13:16 +0000

great post craig. there’s a saying in law that justice doesn’t just need to be done, it needs to appear to be done. otherwise, public confidence in the justice system is undermined (apparently, we don’t do justice well….!) we don’t just need to live morally, we need to appear to live morally, which means our standards really need to be higher.

By: michael

michael — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 11:34:05 +0000

i think we fail to ask ourselves, (1) does it bring glory to god and (2) does it honor my marriage.

we can apply this to our careers, hobbies, and most certainly, every relationship in our lives. have these things hurt or helped our marriage and our standing with god…because it has not left it alone.

we act and think too independently of the father and of our marriages…

By: Bert Boan

Bert Boan — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 04:43:10 +0000

Our lifegroup just did the 2nd week of Hostage tonight. During the conversation we came to a realization that the reason these topics– Bitterness, Worry, etc.– are so poignant, is that they are the roots of sin. Our bitterness leads to lashing out, our worry that we are good enough leads us to seek validation, our fear that we are not good leads us to medicate with the scratch that satisfies the itch.

If we hold on to the fact that we are valuable, loved, worthy, relevant, and necessary to God, for God, and for our families we stay much more engaged and further from the distractions that are “sin.” Our only one true sin is that we don’t believe that God is big enough or intimate enough to meet our needs.

By: Jordan

Jordan — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 03:50:01 +0000

…

By: Jordan

Jordan — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 03:48:48 +0000

Set up clear boundaries in dating relationships. Set “the line” very conservatively so that if you find yourself violating your agreed-on standards, you are still far from any major moral issues.

On a side note, I just graduated from Southeastern University in Lakeland, FL, and I was privileged to hear you at The Forum today. Your session was awesome and I really appreciate your contribution.

By: Steve Kirkeby

Steve Kirkeby — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 17:38:19 +0000

Since I have been in ministry for 20 years and in church leadership for at least 30 years, I look back on what I would of done in a current situation back then. This helps me get through the clutter of current culture (church and non church)and see things clearer.

An example is our current movie night. Every Friday night we show a recently released movie. There has been times when the rating can be very misleading. What was R rated years ago would now be considered PG-13 or PG. We have to preview each movie because what is acceptable (language, sexual references) now in culture may still be unacceptable with the values and message we are speaking to our church and our community.

Bottom line is that we are all swept along by our culture and we have to be careful that we are not making decisions based on our own current cultural experience but the standards God has set for us.

By: Matt King

Matt King — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 17:35:06 +0000

When I hear the term “moral margin” (again Matt Foley) I instantly think of how the Pharisees and their Rabbis had put a hedge around the Law so that even if someone were to violate one the rules, they would still be a long way away from violating the law. One of their rules to help honor the Sabbath was that you could not drink vinegar to cure a tooth ache (because it is work) but if you eat food that has vinegar in it and your tooth ache is eased- it is ok. So when Jesus healed on the Sabbath, it really was violating their hedge.
Pastors especially need to be careful about what kind of a “rules margin” that they teach. (For example no sex because it could lead to dancing)
That being said I once heard a youth pastor comment that he heard warnings to be carefull because “we are all just one step from the gutter.” His responce was “Forget that! There is no way I going stand that close to the gutter”. I think that too often I become convinced that in some way it is normal to be close to or on the verge of sin.

By: Adam

Adam — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 16:38:59 +0000

I try to live with moral margin in ministry everyday. I am a lucky guy though to have a wife who wants to be a part of student ministry too. She has been a blessing over the years when I need to cousel teenage girls to meet with me, or to just do it on her own. I have made it a policy in ministry to never allow myself to be alone with someone of the opposite sex. Also, I have given my wife permission to ask about any conversations I have with a woman in public. She has my back!

By: John Ireland

John Ireland — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 16:34:44 +0000

Choose the “inconvenience” of your spouse and/or a trusted friend know where you are and what you are doing. This would not have to get ridiculous.

But, the idea is don’t allow “shadow” places or activities work their way into our life. If all is in the “light” and known, temptation oftens recedes quickly.

Another thought: would you (I) - without notice - be completely at ease if anyone wanted to look at what is on our computer screen OR even borrow our computer?

By: jon

jon — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 16:29:18 +0000

GREAT POST!!! so many are not willing to admit that this is an issue and face sin, to call it sin, or to deal with it in any way. but it doesn’t just disappear if we ignore it or fail to address it!

i’ve really been focusing in on a passage that has already been mentioned in a previous reply…Brandon Duff…Proverbs 5 is all over this! every day i ask God to keep me away from the door…the path to the door…and to give me sensitivity to it if i’m about to be near. if there is a question in my mind…i have to get out of there, no matter if i can see the door or think it’s even there.

if i’m feeling tempted in any way i have brothers that i can contact to share my situation with and have them pray for me and hold me accountable.

By: Natalie Witcher

Natalie Witcher — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 16:28:46 +0000

David said Psalm 16 that the boundary lines have fallen in pleasant places. Too often I’ve set my boudary line right up agains the sin line. That isn’t a pleasant place. When I let God set the boundary it’s a heck of a lot farther away. Can’t even see the darn thing. Pleasant places. Much better than toes at the line.

So, practically speaking, get as far away from whatever your temptation is. Get radical. The only one you’ve got to report to is God himself. (oh, and those people who are holding you accountable. gotta love ‘em)

By: bryan

bryan — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 16:23:00 +0000

Josh put cultural relevane in quotes (I’m picturing Matt Foley using air quotes even as I type this). Just a reminder, Jesus was culturally relevant.

Btw, I’m planting a church called “Church Relevant” (yes, I used quotes)

By: Troy Maxwell

Troy Maxwell — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 15:56:03 +0000

I believe the key is my intimacy with God. I won’t even approach the line if Jesus is so much a part of my life. I totally agree with you about the whole relevance issue. We have to be so careful not to be of the world just live in it and shine as bright as we can.

By: Bill

Bill — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 15:34:16 +0000

This is always a tough call. Don’t do this or don’t do that. Do this or do that. Don’t hug. Do hug(from the side). Don’t have a member of the opposite sex in the office when by yourself. Do counsel but with the door open. These are “hard” lines to decide and draw. For years I had an “I will not see a woman by myself when no one else is present” mentality. Then I move to pastor a church where we have no building, a part time secretary and an office right along the main drag. Now the question comes: what am I supposed to do? Close all the doors, bar all the windows and say, “I am out of the office” when in fact I am right there? We cannot stop people dropping by. What I try to do (when the youth pastor is not around) is limit the time and limit the exposure (no pun intended) to my time and office of any one person. I also tell my wife who comes to see me (without divulging the conversation unless she needs to know). Right now she is my best accountability partner.

I also agree that instead of asking “how close can I get without sinning?” we ought to be asking, “What do I need to do in this situation to continue being a man/woman of integrity and holiness?”